The end to another chapter
1. Do not fall in love with me. I will break your heart and you will gladly welcome it. You will say that I am worth holding onto and that you will be fine. And I will reply stating whenever I fall asleep I hold onto myself. My own arms wrapped around my torso, my body cradled like a child, I don’t need you or anybody else. I will say again how I am going to break your heart and then I realize I already have.
2. Do not fall in love with me. I am fragile and bruised and people say a lot of things that they don’t mean so I know you will too. It’s just what I have come to accept. We let words spew out of our mouths, we make promises we can’t keep, and I know you probably mean them at the time, but time isn’t something people keep track of, dear. Minutes tick by, months even, and later you will just forget that I exist. And that’s okay, I’m used to it, just don’t promise to stay when I know you couldn’t.
3. Do not fall in love with me. I am like shrapnel. I will leave pieces of my heart with other people after these explosions and it will never be completely yours. You have a jealous soul, and that scares me. I have learned that there are people better than me, and if you choose to leave I would eventually accept that too. You are not bound to me, and I am not bound to you, so if you find someone better, what else could I do?
4. Do not fall in love with me. I will kiss you and mean it and I will want to discover your body and know you like the back of my palms. Do not let me. My body is covered in scars, and it’s gotten used to creating them. They’re not pretty and I don’t create smooth cut lines, but jagged ones. I will leave you. I will leave you bloodied, standing on the side of a road in the rain. As the rain falls down on your opened wounds, you will realize that I sting.
5. Do not fall in love with me. I don’t trust easily, and I will push you away. You will try to fight for me, but trying will just make my feelings decay. Patience was never your virtue, my darling. I can hear the ticking to the time bomb from all the years that we will never have. Time has never been our friend, yet we still attempt to manipulate the inevitable. We try to pretend that this is the least probable outcome. I think I am starting to acknowledge this.
6. Do not fall in love with me, because I am a poet. I put words to things I can’t explain. I write using metaphors and similes, combining phrases to pluck your heartstrings. I feel things way too deeply. When I hurt, I hurt badly. When I cry, you will hear me weeping. I have had my heart gutted out and placed back into the hollow of my chest. Do not fall in love with me, because I am not ready to fall in love with you.